A Guide To Thriving Over The Holidays
This is the time of the year that we are bombarded with messages of the holidays. Besides being a time of joy, it can be a time of resentment and frustration. There are many messages that we can carry regarding expectations for the season. Messages such as: “I have to spend time with my family, I have to buy many gifts, and I am too busy.” I want to encourage you to make this the holiday season that fits for you. It can be hard to change patterns that are “the way it has always been” and make this your season. Whatever your beliefs, many people have an expectation to enjoy the holidays and, sadly, this is not necessarily the outcome for many. Here are some…
Map Out the New Year
Every New Year’s I review what happened in the previous year and contemplate what I want for the rest of this year. I read that the 3rd week of January is when many people wane on their New Year’s resolutions. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but I do engage in a process of imagining what I want for the upcoming year and map out how I can get there. When I consider what I want in the New Year, I look at things that are tangible (a new car), or a quality I want to embody (calmness). One method I use is to make a Vision Board, which is an artistic expression of what I want in the New Year. It is a kind of collage …
Understanding Emotional Eating
Most people have eaten for emotional reasons at one time or another. It can be the go to thought when there is stress. I remember many occasions at work when one person would say to colleagues, “I am stressed – who wants to get something with me (meaning something sweet)?” We were all stressed and didn’t know how to handle it except by eating. Eating to manage emotions over a long period of time can end up having some negative consequences. One of the biggest problems with using food to manage emotions is it can lead to weight issues, and with the weight comes many more problems. Eating for emotional reasons is used to quiet any of a number of emotions such as: sadness, anger, frustration, loneliness…
Spring Cleaning: Let it Go!
I have a confession. There are clothes in my closet that I have not worn in many, many years. I look at those items most days and move through to the next article of clothing that I know I will want to wear. I know that having clothing that I do not wear can be an energy drain. The clothing that I do not wear have some things in common:They do not fit comfortably.I do not like the style or I do not think I look good in that particular style.They look old.I know having clothing in my closet that I won’t wear is not good for me. It reminds me of mistakes in buying that I made. It reminds me I wasted …
Balancing Point
At my gym there is this piece of equipment called a Bosu; a large half ball-half round platform that you balance on when you are performing different exercises. You can stand on the ball portion with the flat side down and as you stabilize your feet do exercise such as squats. You have to engage your core, arms, legs, and feet to remain on the ball. This exercise can be tough for me because if I am not centered and balanced, I will fall off.The same occurs in life; when I am not balanced, I fall down (metaphorically). I have found I need to have a list of strategies that get me back in balance as soon as possible. I am challenging myself to come…
Year End Reflections
At the end of every year I like to reflect and consider what has happened during the previous year. I get excited to spend some private time looking at my calendar, my journal and pictures to piece together my take away for the year. Each year’s reflection looks different and this year is no exception. Some years I write long journal entries about the previous year or I reflect in my mind or with a trusted friend about what I saw as the ups and downs of my life. No matter which method I chose I like to end the year considering what worked and what didn’t. This reflection of the previous year can focus on several aspects of my life or a few. Some areas of…
Food Rules
Do you have food rules? You know the ones you tell yourself you need to follow, so you can be “good”. A lot of people I have met have some type of food rule. You may see these food rules as a way to keep yourself from overeating or gaining weight. Food rules are frustrating/ineffective, because they are hard to follow and they do not work over the long term. Some food rules I have heard are:No candy or chocolate in the house. This rule is used to help you not eat sweets, because you have the idea sweets are bad.No eating after 8pm, even if you are hungry.This rule is used to help you not eat in the nighttime for fear of …
Have you lost that lovin’ feeling for you?
February is the month we look to celebrate our love for another person. Often we focus so much on how we show love to someone else, it makes me wonder how loving we are towards ourselves. One of the most popular blogs on my website is one where I ask the reader to consider whether they are too helpful towards others. I think people click on that blog article because they think they are giving too much and they do not have time or energy to take care of themselves.Today, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, focus on showing loving kindness to yourself. Put some of the love you intend to give to another back to yourself. Has it been a long time since you have…
Writing: My Secret Weapon
I am not a writer, per se, but I like to write. I have been on a few writing retreats lead by nationally known author Laura Davis. I learned from her that anyone can be a writer. Writing can be so healing, cathartic and a real way to figure out what is going on inside of me. She has taught me many tools and techniques for writing, which I share in my articles, with my clients, and they have been personally helpful and transformative. One of the first tips she taught me is- write. Just write, no matter how bad it sounds. Get the thoughts and words on the paper, editing is not necessary and is counterproductive in the beginning stages of writing. Here are some ways…
Ending Emotional Eating: Leftover Halloween candy
I just saw a video from Jimmy Kimmel of an annual prank where he encourages parents to video themselves telling their kids that they ate all of the kids Halloween candy. I must admit it was funny to see the kids have such expressive (sad, mad) reactions. It also made me think of the torment some of us experience after the kids go Trick or Treating and now we are faced with lots of candy in the house or left over candy bought to give out to the kids. This situation can be really difficult for anyone with emotional eating issues. Just having the candy in the house can lead to overeating, obsessive thoughts (“do I eat it or don’t I”) and wondering how we can hide…