personal
Darkness and Light-Solstice Rituals
Darkness and light are very much on my mind this week. I long for the light and count the days towards the winter solstice two weeks from today with a sense of hope trusting the light will return. I love the symbolism of moving toward and into the light. Of actively welcoming the light. And we need more light right now. Oh God how we need it, need to create more of it, need to embody and share it in as many ways as we are able. The world has been so very dark. I wanted a ritual for the next 14 days to conjure and celebrate light. I created a small altar to the light for this. It’s a bunch of votives and candles with some…
Do i regret recovery?
I got asked if i ever regretted recovery, and to answer honestly. And my aanswer is a complete and honest NO. It would be very hard to write this blog, to help so many others, motivate people to recover if I, myself secretly longed back to being underweight.I dont ever want to go back to the way i was before. Tired, so filled with hate towards myself, the world and everyone around me. Constantly hungry, but at the same time full and sick feelings. Watching as everyone else ate and lived life. Exercising for hours, and self harming in all sorts of ways. No sleep. Too many thoughts, too many guilt feelings and panicked feelings. I would never go back to that just so that i …
Spending the weekend out on an island
Good morning, it’s only 10am but feels like half the day has already passed. As usual i woke up around 5.30/6am due to my bodies own alarm clock, and despite not having any lectures today it nice to wake up early and start my day early… (and other days its nice to just sleep as long as i can with no alarm clock!). I got up and got ready and decided to go to the gym however once i got there i realised that it didnt open until 8am as it is a sort of holiday-day, so shops open later than usual as well as most people being free from work or school, though i didnt think about that. I had more than an hour …
Sunshine and travelling out to an island – flexing and happiness
Hello 🙂 I am sorry for the lack of posts today and i guess the next few days, but i am going to really enjoy the sunshine and try to just disconnect. But leave topics or questions and i will try to answer them and schedule some posts :)Today has been a great day so far! After my morning post today i bought myself some strawberries and then ate them on the train to Stockholm while trying to study. And then i was home for about 5 minutes before i had to leave again where it was a drive out to the boat to the island (with a stop to do some food shopping!).Once out on the island it was just to unpack, sit in the …
Start the day fresh and dont let fear hold you back
Good morning world :)Or well those of you who decide to check in on my little blog and my updates! It is Saturday morning, the sun is shining and today there is nothing planned to do. Well it is hard to plan to do anything when you are out on an island, there’s not really any place to go or anything to do. Instead it is about creativity and spending time with others… or well, relying on internet and watching Youtube videos. And i did a bit of both yesterday!Lots of exercise yesterday and lots of time in the sun lead to a very tired and somewhat red body today. To sum up yesterday, it was a nice day where i didnt do so much but …
Making sure to eat enough and get enough salt – vegetarian/vegan lunch buffet & my weekly food shop
Hello :)Hope everyone is doing ok 🙂 for me personally I felt absaloutly awful today. No energy, my legs and body felt weak.. just standing took so much energy for me and I had this constant feeling of dizziness and faintness and I almost considered going to the hospital as I felt so incredibly weak – like my legs couldn’t even carry my weight.But I got myself together as I had lunch plans at a vegetarian lunch buffet which I had been looking forward to. And once I got there and began to eat I felt so much better. My energy returning, my mental energy returning and suddenly standing didn’t make me feel like gravity was pushing me back down to the ground. I’ve been eating enough …
A day of meal prepping, procrastinating and avoiding the sun
Hello :)I had written a post this morning which was going to be posted this evening but it appears to have disapeared, but i guess its just as good… it was mostly just a long ramble of how i feel and thoughts. Maybe a good thing that it wasnt published, haha. But in all honesty, it wasnt a negative “my thoughts” post, thats a shocker. Infact it was about how i am feeling rather happy at the moment. I am feeling content and control of things – somewhat anyway. But i am choosing to be happy, choosing to be positive and making changes in my life that will help that. Distancing myself from social media, unfollowing accounts that give me no inspiration and instead following accounts that inspire …